Single parents and dating with children
It is natural to want your new love to lavish you with attention and affection but if you are dating a single parent the chances are their kids get the largest share of their attention.Even though you know that is how it should be, it may still cause feelings of jealousy – whatever you do don’t nag or complain for more – this is likely to make your date feel like they have taken on another child rather than an adult date.Most single parents are dating because they want to shed their role as mum or dad for a while and engage in the adult world.
If, when and how you meet the kids has to be the decision of the parent.
They will naturally be reticent about introducing someone new into their children’s lives too soon – they will usually want to be sure of the relationship themselves first.
Browse for potential friends and partners from the safety of your own home, without having to juggle children and babysitters – get to know other single parents at your own pace.
Before you embark on single parent dating, consider reading our advice pages: dating for parents, online dating safety and writing an online dating profile.
Try not to take it personally – they probably would want to spend more time with you if they could.
Use other means to keep in touch – texting, phone calls and emails and value the time you do get together.
When you’re first dating all you need to say is that you’re going out with a friend. If you’re getting to the point when it’s time for your kids to meet this new partner, create a scene for success. Say that you’d like them to meet this special friend (they should know the person’s name by now).
They don’t even have to know his or her name at this stage. Reassure them “All kids want to know is that they’re still the most important people in your life no matter what. You can acknowledge their question, assess whether or not it’s one you should answer and just simply tell them that you aren’t going to answer that right now. Then listen, acknowledge and validate—no matter what their reaction is.
“This is one of those cases where less is more,” she says.