If you are drinking, keep your drink in sight at all times and don't get so drunk that you don't know what you are doing. Provide your own transportation to your public meeting place and make sure you have more than enough gas. Never assume a man is safe just because he claims to be religious or a gentleman.

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If the date feels like a hook-up, that’s probably what he’s seeking.

To be sure you don’t give the wrong impression, “set a date for the future, and make it the right time of day and place so the intention of getting to know each other is there in the beginning,” recommends Ian Kerner, Ph.

After a few dates with a guy, you feel like this could lead to something, when suddenly he falls off the face of the earth.

Or it’s been months—he’s even uttered the word “girlfriend”—and out of nowhere he says he’s not ready for a relationship.

D., co-author of Her take: “The first guy I dated when I moved to New York let me take care of him, which I thought would lead to a relationship.

I was doing things for him like baking cookies, redecorating his place, and having lots of sex, but I found out he had no intention of commitment at all.” -Kate, 28.

Expert take: A lot of guys have two categories of women they’re dating: the women they just want to have sex with and the women they’re interested in having long-term relationships with, Kerner says.

In this situation, Kate might have been giving too much too soon.

Her take: “I went out with a guy I met online who seemed really sweet and charming. A few days later, he texts me to say that he isn't looking for a girlfriend—just casual sex.