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I recently passed my driving test (woopah) and I immediately bought two nodding dogs off e Bay.
Do I keep quiet about the potential disaster that will be the ‘surprise!
’, and also run the risk I will be blamed for the divulging of the secret, or do I tell the party planner that the secret is out, which may give her an opportunity to plan a double bluff surprise?
Karen from East Grinstead: I am making a mash-up of songs called or about New York, so answer me this: what’s your favourite New York-related song so I can put it in my megamix just for you?
Ben from Stafford: my sister is listening to some craptastic song very loudly while I’m trying to revise for my GCSEs and I can’t help but pay attention to its fucking terrible lyrics.
Jeannette from Torrance: my coworker was nibbling on prunes today (which is weird, since she’s only 24 and doesn’t appear to be badly constipated), and this led to a discussion about why dried plums are called prunes and dried grapes are called raisins, but all other fruit is just called “dried [fill in fruit name here].” Why don’t other fruits have cute names for their dehydrated versions?
Anthony: I live in Moscow and tend to travel a lot. Answer me this – why do they put phones near the toilet in a hotel room? I have never seem anyone do this in their house, where it’s a lot further from the toilet to the phone.
On numerous occasions I have ended up wrapped around a lamp-post or in a ditch because the stupid mutt has slammed his anchors on mid-run with no prior warning to go for a shit, thus him stopping and me carrying on while still attached to the other end of his lead!
So, answer me this: in the Iditarod Great Sled Race in Alaska, how do they prevent all the dogs from stopping all the flipping time to knock one out without sending the Musher into a fir tree every ten minutes?
Debbie in Paderborn, Germany: I have a Siberian Husky that needs long walks every day to burn off all of his energy.
I achieve this by either going out on my rollerblades or cycling with him in tow.
Some person who is speaking quite fast and is trying to pass it off as music keeps mentioning someone called “shorty” and I’ve just realised that I hear of this person in a lot of songs, mainly in this shit-storm of a genre, but I still don’t know who it is.