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"Even within the alternative communities, a lot of people don't understand it," Ellie explains. "It all comes down to one basic premise: your kink is not my kink and that's OK."Part of ANR's taboo stems from some fundamental misunderstandings about who participates in it – and what it means.
Where the "ick" factor comes in for many people – and where the triggering nature of the act lies for some survivors of childhood sexual abuse – is that it's perceived to be sexualizing an act that's associated with babies or child rearing.
They have a clear affection for each other, touching each other gently on the shoulder when one says something the other appreciates and often looking at each other lovingly throughout conversation.
It is released during arousal and sexual activity, but even more so during nursing.
Not only that, its release produces a relaxing effect for both partners.
"If you're sexually active and nursing, breast milk is a part of your life all the time," she explains.
The same oxytocin that's released during nursing is produced during arousal and orgasm, meaning that someone who is lactating to nurse their baby may also experience the release of milk during sex with their partner.
"It's a nice way to relax or fall asleep at the end of the day," says Chelsea.
This is partially backed up by scientific research, which shows that oxytocin can lessen fear and anxiety by reducing activation of the amygdala.People's reasons for entering ANRs can be wildly different.Some are women who decided to induce lactation for their own reasons – perhaps they were unable to have children and lactating makes them feel more connected to their femininity, or provides some sort of emotional satisfaction — and enjoy sharing their milk with partners.But this is not adult baby syndrome or age play, which involve the fetish of being infantilized.ANRs occur between two consenting adults who behave as adults within the context of their relationship, whether it's a platonic relationship, romantic relationship, or BDSM relationship.Prolactin, the other hormone produced by lactation, has also been shown to lower stress in the person producing it, with lactating women demonstrating less intense responses to adrenaline.